Breakable Hearts

Our hearts…
where our life-blood flows

Our hearts…
designed to imbibe and transport the oxygen and nutrients enabling us to function and move in this world

Our hearts…
the oft-times descriptor of our inner person – the soul and spirit of us

Our hearts…
said to be where our strength lies; where our weakness lies

Our hearts…
fragile or hard as stone; supple or unmoved

Our hearts…
given – with or without boundaries
trusting – with or without trustworthiness
withheld – with or without provocation
desensitised – with or without intention

Our hearts…
longing…afraid…battered…boxed…open…closed off…sheltered…exposed…vulnerable

Do I know what a safe space for my heart looks like?

Am I a safe place for my own heart? The heart of another?

Do I choose to look for a safe a space for my heart?

Will I receive another’s heart into my space?

Will I give my heart into another’s trustworthy space?

Unbreakable Heart, JJ Heller

Joel

Joel – Gone to Jesus
24/4/2021

Oh my heart!
Wretched pain
Piercing loss
Soul disdains
Parting sorrow
Not so sweet
I long the ache
“Cease to seep!”

All my griefs
From long ago
Return in part
With this new blow
But other griefs
Remind me too
Though pain remains
Ease can ensue

And so I sit
Within the pain
Of broken-hearted
Loss today
But I will seek
The pathway to
A joyful life…
Enjoined with loss of you

26-7/4/2021
Gina Marie

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Tomorrow

All our tomorrow’s, we’ll wake without you
And each new yesterday, the same will be true
Our sorrows will ease, but we cannot see how
And our grief will return, even as it does now

One day I’ll remember, you’re “the man with the plan”
I’ll think of your joy, that God’s grace makes you stand
When I’ll wake in the night, and think a message has come
Or pray with a friend, but hear your cries to the son

Sometime making a fudge cake, hearing a bike on my street
See your tea on the shelf, in the box where it keeps
I’m walking a path, where we’d go for a chat
And then all of a sudden, I’ll wish that you would be back

But I don’t really wish It, though today you’re not here
You were looking ahead to when you’d shed no more tears
Still I love you, and miss you, though I’ve bid you farewell
I’ll wake tomorrow without you, but my soul still can be well

1/5/2021
Gina Marie

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Stronger

When traumatic ways
Cut into your days –
Stronger were you

When you tried hard to flee
As shame tugged at your sleeve –
Stronger were you

When by mem’ry beset
Till finding peace was a test –
Stronger were you

Finding peace and rest in Love’s store
You longed to run to his shore –
Learned he’s stronger than you

Now in Love’s presence, on high
By Love’s wings, swept through the sky –
Indeed, Love’s stronger than you

Gina Marie
13/26 May 2021

When God Became One of Us

Matthew 26:36-46

From the scriptures I call the Bible, I believe that God became one of us. When Jesus as God in human form walked this earth, I see he remained God and chose to be a human living as dependent on the divine father and in community with other humans, as humans have been designed to live.

In his humanness, while approaching his mortal demise, he has brought along those closely connected with him, “Sit here, while I go and pray…” Possess this spot, this place…sit here, nearby, while I work through this heaviness with the father.

In his humanness, Jesus calls yet nearer those more intimately connected to him thus far…”Stay here and watch with me.” In this piercing and distressing walk toward mortal demise…stay, abide, endure, be present – in this place, with these things – with collected thoughts, vigilant, awakening…near to me, though I seek a space on my own with the father. Community.

As a fellow human to other humans, do you keep space alongside another – do I…do you keep alert, are you awakening to their person, their journey – am I…do you keep watch on their behalf – do I…are we community for each other…do we know that we need the ultimate divine spirit to enable us – do I?

24/3/2021

Weighted Walking

On my return walk this morning (the downhill section!), I was overtaken by a young jogger. We said hi as she passed, just as I and the other walkers/joggers had done this morning, and I noticed she was ‘carrying’ weights – strapped to her body.

“I’m carrying weight too,” I smiled to myself. “Didn’t need to strap any extra on!”

My conversation with myself (I have many) reminded me of some race-running analogies in the Bible.

The writer of Hebrews in the New Testament has just finished a brief, condensed recap of some of Israel’s biographical history. The personal stories of men, women, their families and descendants who hopefully-endured, waited, sat under and with their circumstances or calls to action. Trusting in God’s proven faithfulness to them in life on earth, and their having faith that he will fulfil all future promises.

Chapter twelve of Hebrews begins with a call, an invitation, a compelling, a challenge to us in light of such historical proves of God’s faithfulness and promise-keeping.

We are challenged to cast off and lay aside every bulging, bending, aching, all-encompassing weight and sin which would keep us from hitting the target, the mark, and receiving the prize of the unencumbered life eternal in unhindered loving relationship with our Heavenly Father. A life purchased at great cost to him and the son of God through whom we have access to this unencumbered life. A life which begins here on this earth and finds its fulfilment in the hereafter.

And what is the mark, the target, the prize we aim for and will receive if we’re actually/honestly searching…himself, God himself (Hebrews ch. 11 v 6). When it’s him we seek, it is himself he rewards us with.

And this was written for those who live after Christ Jesus has come, providing all that is necessary for us to reach the target. Before Jesus walked the earth as God in human flesh, in the Old Testament of the Bible, Jeremiah ch. 29 v10-14 (29:10-14), Israel were told that he (God) will be found by those who seek for, search out, the Lord with their whole self…current and future promises assured, and freedom from the ties that bind and constrict us. Ties keeping us from the mark and the loving relationship with him that awaits.

Is the weight that bulges, encompasses, constricts and binds you something you have strapped on? Are there unnecessary/unrequired things that you have taken on, mull over, slowing you down and skewing the view and scope of your direction?

Is this weight that keeps you from hitting your mark, skewing your aim for the person of Jesus and loving relationship with him and his people, something you ingest (like my carried extra weight), imbibe, devour?

Throw them off!

Lay them aside!

And Hebrews 11 not only tells us who the mark is, but how to aim and fly so that we make it to him…faith…”that he is a rewarder of those who diligently seek him.”

27/2/2021

If you’re interested, here is a poem I wrote about The Mark

Sixteenth Reflection

You took me to the mountains
And underneath the earth
Then high atop a canyon
To water pouring down, dispersed
We sat upon the sand
And walked along the shore
I closed my eyes, your song to me
All around me soared

And now I sit and wonder
At the wonder that you’ve been
You safely lead me out to
My desired, but missing dreams
We shared the day I had not noticed
Till the day was halfway done
Where I had feared to go alone
You lead me…forever faithful one

17/2/2021

And a River Runs Right Through It

Forever home
All things new
A city awed
A peace imbued

And a river runs right through it

Downward, paced
Set from on high
Readymade, adorned
Provide

And a river runs right through it

Swept of tear
And shadow’s death
Away! Begone!
Reside amidst

And a river runs right through him

Behold! The new!
And all things true!
Beginning’s end
To thirst will rend

Because a river runs right through him

Light-of-life
Illumined home
Gated, walled
By those I’ve known

And a river runs right through him

Founded firm
On lives hard-won
By Lion-Lamb
Betroth-ed one

And a river runs right through him

Divinely lit
The glory sun
Is presence
Walking with his ones

And a river runs right through him

Open door
Night is gone
Engrave-ed names
Of those who come

And a river runs right through it

The purest flow
Forth-going from
The lamb enthroned
Heals every one
Planted by
The banks to feed
Those never more
In curse to bleed
While looking on
Her shepherd’s face
The bride is home
Unending grace

And a river runs right through it

Revelation 21-22:5
30/11/2020

Gina Marie

How Many Loves…

How many loves, dear?
Is there a counting of the ways?
Is it love when two souls become one without sway?
Is a love defined, dear
In the longing of a child?
The compassion of a parent t’ward wand’rers in the wild?
Is there a calling of love, dear
In the sound between friends?
The weaving and binding of a bond without end
Is there imparting of love, dear
When communities reach out?
In the sharing of joys, great tragedy or doubt
How many loves, dear?
Is there a counting of the ways?
Or just a lifetime discov’ring, all love’s great reach and sway?

17/3/2020
Gina Marie

Bride of Christ, Family of God

If our debate about the way we relate to each other as the body/family of Christ does not first stem from our understanding of our need, and the nature of our relationship with our God through His Son, by His Spirit, then the debate will go on. And our relationships will be dysfunctional.

For example:

If those who are the children of God through a right relationship with His Son, Jesus, confirmed by the presence of His Spirit within their own spirit, are called the bride of Christ then would not all have to relate to Christ as husband…including men, singles, divorcees, widows/widowers, children, teens, and wives? If each understood, believed, valued and lived in light of Christ as husband, comforter, provider, leader, lover, ‘head’, forgiver, restorer, friend, saviour, would we not better understand ourselves and our own roles in that light?

Just wondering.